Europe is 6 months. Not years. When people start talking this rubbish it does not help.
Unless you want a visa for longer than 6 months, it is pretty general across the world that a visitor must have 6 months left on their passport. It was only within the EU that we could travel on a document which was reaching end of date.
The passport office will do a 1 day fast track. You need to fill out the forms online and you must only be doing a renewal, you can't do it with a damaged passport. It costs nearly £200. But the appointment won't be tomorrow, it will be when they have one free.
if you want the standard service, then the current waiting list is 3-4 weeks. However if you pay for the Post office fast track offering, you can get it in 2 weeks.
I know, I have just had mine done and it was damaged. It took 2 weeks in the end because Peterborough didn't have appointments left to do it all in one week and I had to wait a week for the appointment. The people who are 8-9 weeks are those who just fill out the form and send it, make mistakes and cause work for the passport office. Those 8-9 week stats include all passports including those which are re-submitted multiple times with mistakes.