A patronising Christmas
Posted: 17 Dec 2017, 13:05Today, in its Features and Analysis pages the BBC offers tips for Christmas on a budget.
Did you know that you can have a buffet on Boxing day and save all that time and money preparing and buying in all the goodies. Your guests can even bring sharing plates to bulk things out.
I bet nobody in the history of the Universe has ever thought of that.
Or what about saving on wrapping paper by using children's artwork? Of course you will need a child, one who can draw, and you will at some time have had to buy in the paper and crayons or paints.
But not to worry, all the items are available in charity shops - good ones even have children.
How about not buying Christmas candles when you can make your own? Get back to that charity shop and buy a decorated cup and saucer. Fill it with coloured wax and of course a wick and you will have a 'fake' luxurious Christmas candle.
I'll tell you why not! It's fri99ing simpler and cheaper to just go and buy the damned candle.
Maybe you could make your own decorations, there's still plenty of time - or not! All you need is paper, glue, food colourings, rice, popcorn, old cards, string, glitter.... you get the idea.
But you will need a whole bloomin' year to make the damned things, and try getting glitter out of the carpet once the glue has set.
Christmas on a budget, my fundament.
I'm off the Home Bargains tomorrow where I can get everything I need in five minutes and for not much money and when I am done it will all look professional not like some abortion by one of these makeover artist experts.
Merry Christmas.
Did you know that you can have a buffet on Boxing day and save all that time and money preparing and buying in all the goodies. Your guests can even bring sharing plates to bulk things out.
I bet nobody in the history of the Universe has ever thought of that.
Or what about saving on wrapping paper by using children's artwork? Of course you will need a child, one who can draw, and you will at some time have had to buy in the paper and crayons or paints.
But not to worry, all the items are available in charity shops - good ones even have children.
How about not buying Christmas candles when you can make your own? Get back to that charity shop and buy a decorated cup and saucer. Fill it with coloured wax and of course a wick and you will have a 'fake' luxurious Christmas candle.
I'll tell you why not! It's fri99ing simpler and cheaper to just go and buy the damned candle.
Maybe you could make your own decorations, there's still plenty of time - or not! All you need is paper, glue, food colourings, rice, popcorn, old cards, string, glitter.... you get the idea.
But you will need a whole bloomin' year to make the damned things, and try getting glitter out of the carpet once the glue has set.
Christmas on a budget, my fundament.
I'm off the Home Bargains tomorrow where I can get everything I need in five minutes and for not much money and when I am done it will all look professional not like some abortion by one of these makeover artist experts.
Merry Christmas.
Showing us all how simple it is, when you have a title and pots of money 
