Vocal Voices

I do some volunteer work with an old gal aged 82. This morning she announces that she has got 'visitors', which turn out to be a couple of field mice, and she shows me the traps she has put down - all seven of them!

When her cleaner comes round we are chatting about the mice when Lou says that Z should sit in her chair with a blunderbuss: "That'll sort them".

Next thing Z goes behind the grandfather clock and pulls out..... an Elephant gun... all six feet of it! "And if that doesn't get them this will" she says as she emerges with an army officer's sword!

If I was one of the mice I would be throwing myself on the trap.

The lady. has spirit

Eek!!!

Not a lady to be messed with

Crikey!

Honestly, she is five foot and a fag paper and weighs about the same as pack of tissues.

The gun, a beautifully decorated antique, was taller than she is! The bore was about 1 inch and if the breech is anything to go by the 'shell' was about the size of a Mars bar.

My executive decision is to be on my very best behaviour on all future visits.

Very wise WM

Mice are cheeky little varmints; they will probably set up home in the gun barrel!

Crommers, they really could. The breech would make a nice nest for the kiddies.

I'll try and get a photo the next time I am there.