Four Weddings and a Penalty Shootout

[TheOstrich]

Great read Os! £1 for a tray of chips seems a bit of a bargain. Street! I passed through Street about 30 years since. It was memorable mainly for a man stumbling out of a pub and reeling into the road right in front of our car. The gentleman then collected himself and in a comedy I'm-not-drunk-me-ho-no walked in a dignified manner across the road before tripping over the far kerb and falling flat on his face.

The cider must be strong down there!

[victor]

Great report as usual Os keep it up

[TheOstrich]

12/08 – As there’s now’t much on the telly these days, two midweek games to report on first. On Tuesday, Ossie’s first dabble in the Wiltshire Senior League which took the bird up north to Trowbridge Town FC for a 6:30 kick-off. I had discovered the ground, at the prosaically named Axe and Cleaver Lane, last year whilst driving around in circles trying to avoid that maelstrom known as Trowbridge Town Centre. I knew it was close to the White Horse Business Park and eventually managed to track it down again. Driving up the gravelled pathway towards the club’s buildings, I passed a grim-looking old codger astride a mobility scooter. He was, I discovered, actually taking admission and selling programmes out of his pannier bag. I went back and paid my dues, which turned out to be a smart move as I later learnt in the refreshment hut that if you bypass him, he will drive across to the pitch and relentlessly track you down during the match!
The first half highlight was a 35m rather soft penalty given for handball, which was well saved by the home keeper. The second half highlight was a Chinook helicopter passing across the southern horizon. That more or less sums the match up. No surprise it was goalless, one of those contests where they’d still be playing now without breaking the deadlock. Reasonably entertaining match for the neutral, nevertheless.

On Wednesday, the Ostrich thought it had died and gone to heaven. Investigating the refreshments menu at Raleigh Grove, the home of Sherborne Town FC where a reserves match was being staged, the bird eyes glazed over at the pie selection. Simon, who if I’ve got this right was the brother-in-law of the newly installed first team manager, runs a business from home providing artisan pies for the fancy catering trade. And now he’s been inveigled into running Sherborne’s tea hut! Ossie commenced with a steak, black pudding and horseradish pie, sensibly priced at £2.50, and it was divine. Racing back to the hut at half-time (long queue!), a scrummy hunters chicken pie with cheese topping was procured. I complemented Simon on the taste and quality of his offerings, whilst making a mental note to find out when Sherborne have upcoming midweek fixtures so I can plough my way through the rest of his selection. You will be hearing more from Raleigh Grove at a later date ….
The game was far better fayre than the previous night, and featured a little bit of history from my perspective – after 40m, a Sherborne defender was caught in possession on the edge of the area and harried mercilessly into making a wild pass across his goal, which Sturminster Newton United’s no.9 gleefully intercepted and rocketed home. Sherborne’s no.6 made his feelings known to the referee , and this being the Dorset Senior League, which has been told by the FA to trial an experimental new rule this season, it was yellow card shown and off to cool his heels for 10 minutes, rugby union style, in the sin bin! There was a little confusion because it has not quite been made clear yet how referees should signal a sin-binning. I believe they are supposed to branding a blue card (as compared with a yellow or a red), but they haven’t been issued yet! “Stur” ran out comfortable 0-3 winners on the night.

So to today, and a journey through the middle of Salisbury city centre to the eastern suburb of Laverstock for an FA Cup tie. The Dell is a rather spartan ground, accessed down a short track off the main drag through the village. It was a strange game, for most of the match nowhere near as entertaining as the final scoreline suggests - the bulk of the action coming in the last 10 minutes. Knaphill, from the Combined Counties League, had proved the more resilient of the two teams, and after a rather niggly, booking strewn, stop / start 80 minutes, were coasting to a 0-2 victory, courtesy of two first half strikes by Jim Norman, the first a direct free kick into the corner, and the second a chip over the keeper. They didn’t look in any trouble, but then in the space of two minutes it became 2-2 after Mankin had neatly lobbed the away keeper, and the referee, who had needed to keep a firm grip on the game throughout, had given a penalty which I think stemmed from the keeper’s challenge on a home attacker, but nobody was really sure. I don’t think Lavvy could believe their luck!
But then Knaphill re-took the lead on 86m when Taylor broke away and rounded the Lavvy keeper to score, and in injury time he repeated the feat, this time slipping the ball across goal for Turner to net. A fair result in the end, but a rather unlikely 6 goal game.

FA Cup Preliminary Qualifying Round: Laverstock & Ford 2 Knaphill 4
Admission: £3, programme £1 (a bit spartan, but mustn’t grumble these days), teams obtained from the whiteboard by the entrance, which is a helpful feature used by many Wessex League.
Refreshments: small cod £2.80 from the take-away opposite the ground. It’s fish, Jim, but not as we know it. It was more like a square fillet than a fish, and the batter was running with grease. Served by two unsmiling Chinese ; I’ve seen Jackie Chan villains more cuddly. Tea and Maltesers from the refreshment hut £2, and free burgers and hotdogs were available on a help-yourself basis when the hut shut up shop around the 80m mark. No, I only had one …. Shame on you thinking otherwise!
Attendance: probably around 150.

[miasmum]

I have just been catching up on these Ossie. Brilliant as ever. Those pies sound delish and certainly answers the question 'who ate all the pies?' The ostrich did

[cromwell]

I’ve seen Jackie Chan villains more cuddly.

Those Sherborne pies sound wonderful!

[Kaz]

Oh Shell, you beat me to the punchline there!

[Ally]

Great read Ossie.

[victor]

Away from Ossie's reports for a moment

Portsmouth were home to WALSALL last Saturday--a Walsall fan booked a hotel for after the game to stay overnight,it said 11 miles from the ground,that put him on the Isle of Wight !!!!!!!

[TheOstrich]

Yes, that got a mention in the Times, Vic. You'd really think he'd have been more on the ball than that, wouldn't you?

Still, Walsall got a 1-1 draw which was a good result for them.

[Kaz]

Oh that is funny!