It's Murder, On The Orient Express ....

[Ally]

re the weigh in.

I'm presuming "H" wasn't horse?!

Great read thanks Ossie.

I like a hilly town...

[cromwell]

New Model Army indeed! I am pretty sure that Bradford on Avon is rather more picturesque than Bradford, West Yorkshire!
Great report Os; like Ally I had to laugh at the weigh in tale!

[TheOstrich]

15/09 – It was the poet John Keates who wrote that Autumn is “the season of mists and mellow fruitfulness”. He could have added marrows, but I guess Mrs O probably put a veto on that. It’s the time of year when the Ostrich gets a longing for the large green stripy things, but Mrs O says firmly, “I am not cooking one of those $&^%$£ things!” Any further discussion on the culinary merits of the vegetable are usually curtailed with an advisory to place the said marrow in the same place where that nice Mr. Elon Musk was requested to place his midget rescue submarine a couple of months back.

We have a Farmers Country Market in town, and I popped in on Friday just to see if it had been a good season for marrows – a visit purely for research purposes, naturally – only to learn they were all sold out. But the Vegetable Lady, before I could stop her, said that she would definitely source a prize specimen for me and I could pick it up next week! “Ah …”, I said, and then had to go back home to confess to Mrs O that a large bazooka had been reserved with her name on it ……

I got the distinct impression that next week’s menu will feature an Ostrich and marrow risotto …..

To the football, and two fixtures this week. Autumn is also the time of FA Cup Competitions, and this week we saw two far South-West clubs make the long journey up to Somerset to fulfil cup fixtures. The first on Tuesday, was Plymouth Parkway FC, who drew 0-0 the previous Saturday at home to Street, and therefore had to venture up to The Tannery ground to face “the Cobblers” again in the replay.

Plymouth Parkway are an interesting club; formed as a Youth team in 1988, they have progressed up the various leagues and as winners of the South West Peninsula League last year, took promotion to Step 6 to play in the Western League – a big move as it means regular journeys up as far as Bristol. During their rise up the divisions, somehow Plymouth Parkway managed to obtain sponsorship from Exeter Airport (!) and their yellow and blue club colours come from the airport’s logo.

I last visited Street around a year ago, and apart from a mobile caterer “Dave’s Diner”, on-site down by the turnstiles, there appears to be little change to the stadium. It seems they are doing up the clubhouse and that might be why the usual refreshment hatch isn’t currently in operation.

There was a bit of a shock result on a drizzly night which created a pitch perfect for sliding tackles, both legal and illegal. Street raced into the attack, but contrived to find themselves 0-2 down within 15 minutes completely against the run of play. First Plymouth’s Jordan Trott blasted a direct free kick from the edge of the area through the wall, and the ball took a deflection to the keeper’s right and into the corner of the net (7m). Then on 13m Mike Smith found himself unmarked on the right wing, and was able to unleash a precision 15 yard shot across the hapless keeper and just inside the post.

That rocked the home side, and they started to find it increasingly difficult to penetrate Parkway’s uncompromising defence. The yellow cards started to mount up, and it began to get a bit tetchy out there, but thankfully the game didn’t degenerate. The referee must have worn his whistle out, though.

On 54m, Street’s Waldy hauled down an attacker just outside the area – I thought it close to a red card offence, but only a yellow was shown; no matter, he received his marching orders for a second yellow on 75m and Trott then created a goal with another hard-struck direct free-kick, knocked in by Carter. Street were still reeling from that when two minutes later, Carter made it 0-4, virtually unchallenged.

Street had previously hauled off both their principal strikers, who were making no headway at all, and it was left to substitute Butcher to score their consolation goal on 81m. A thoroughly entertaining game, although quite why Parkway thought it necessary to play out the last four minutes or so down by the opposition corner flag, I’ve no idea.

I had a bit of a fright on the way home. Driving back from the ground towards Somerton, 10:00 at night in VERY murky conditions, I suddenly found my vision had developed a big black blob, which certainly wasn’t anything on the windscreen as the wipers were going full blast. The blob got bigger, and lower – and just as I was thinking about pulling over, wondering if I was experiencing some sort of major eyesight problem, I had a flash of inspiration! I let out a huge puff of breath – and the flippin’ Dorset Spider that was descending from a thread inside the car, this side of the windscreen, scuttled back up to hide behind the sun visor!!


FA Cup First Round Qualifying Replay: Street 1 Plymouth Parkway 4
Admission £6, Raffle £1
Programme: £1.50 (32pp, colourful,a very good effort considering the short notice)
Refreshments: £3.40 for a bacon & egg sandwich from the burger van. Tasted a bit odd, but that might have been the frying fat.
Attendance: 207

The second game involved Ossie’s first visit to Rowdens Road, the home of Wells City FC, which can be found on the south side of the A371; if approaching from Shepton Mallet, turn left just before the major roundabout (A39 junction), and Rowdens Road is second on the right. Not the first on the right, which is a dead end – as I discovered! There’s ample parking on the premises, once you have entered through the ornate black wrought-iron gates which are a memorial to the sporting achievements of Mrs Mary Bignall Rand, born and brought up in the city, now 78 and living in California. As Mary Rand, she set a world record at the 1964 Tokyo Olympics with 22 feet 2 ¼ inches in the long jump, and became the first female British athlete to win an Olympic gold medal in both track and field events.

Before the game, I wandered across the ring road into the city. The first thing to note is that if you want to visit the Cathedral, don’t head for the edifice with the tallest spire. That’s the 13th Century St. Cuthbert’s Parish Church, and apparently I’m not the first tourist to make that mistake! Still, it did have an imposing display of reredoses, and I could have climbed up to the top of the bell-tower if I’d had the energy; they were having a Church Open Day. The reredoses (altarpieces) were, it is said, probably constructed in 1445 by an itinerant stone-carver simply known as “The Reredos Master”, but come the Reformation, under the Bishopric of William Barlow, who was a renowned rooter-outer of idolatry and so on , the reredoses were destroyed. However the fragments of the sculptures were all piled back into the niches, which were subsequently plastered over. And there they remained until they were re-discovered during refurbishment of the church in the 19th century – thankfully, the workmen realised what they’d uncovered, and the fragmented sculptures were saved for history.

The other interesting thing I found in Wells was a strange, pokey little shop / visitor centre with a connection to the Falkland Islands Agency. Apparently it’s run by a couple who are ex Falkland Islanders, and on sale in there, you can buy bags of natural white Merino fleece wool for £6, or the rarer coloured Merino fleece wool for £9 each.

Returning to Rowdens Road, it’s an attractive, spacious ground, largely because it used to house a cricket pitch! The clubhouse itself is set back by the training area, outside the turnstiles - it was absolutely heaving when I arrived, so I didn’t linger and entered the ground. Next to the paystation, it looks like a new store shed is being constructed, with the workmen on site today. Walking around the goal and down the far side, you encounter the changing room portacabins, an elderly breeze block and steel elevated stand with bench seating, the foot-wells so cramped you either have to sit sideways, or splay like a crab (but it does give excellent views) and then two further small buildings; the tea hut, which is called the “Tea Hut” , and a hospitality suite. The whole area looked well-tended, with manicured lawn and young trees by the changing rooms, and a bird-feeder hanging from a more mature tree down towards the bottom goal.

There was an incident before the game. Having visited the Tea Hut, an indignant Ostrich arrived back in front of the main stand, feathers fully fluffed out, and loudly addressed the assembled crowd of away supporters:

“It’s only 2:30, and you’ve eaten all the pasties! Didn’t you bring your own with you?”

This provoked raucous laughter from the visitors, up from St. Austell.

There then followed an interesting internal discussion amongst the Cornish folk, way above Ossie’s pay-grade, as to the merits of said pasties, with the prevailing opinion that they were “awful”. Chatting with them, an interesting thing emerged. I asked if they still did the traditional tin miners’ pasties, the “half and halfers” as they called them, which contain meat and potato at one end and jam and fruit at the other. The general consensus after much chuntering was no, but then “Grandma” as she was called, remarked:

“There is one place. There’s that shop in Camelford …. ”

That started a new round of discussion.

“Ah yes, that shop in Camelford ….”
“I’ve had one there, it was lovely”
“But don’t you have to order them?”
“Yes, and they’re closed on Wednesdays!”

So there you have it!

St. Austell have made a pretty good start to their season whilst Wells, relegated last season, are currently mid-table in the Western League Division 1. The home side looked to have some issues in defence today; the keeper didn’t seem all that confident, and St. Austell’s no.3, Jack Calver, was given veritable oceans of space to roam down the left wing, which he did very effectively indeed. St. Austell spent the first 10 minutes or so pushing the ball about in midfield before it dawned on them that Wells were there for the taking, and after a Matt Lloyd header had been blocked by the keeper, and the follow-up cleared off the line by a defender, Lloyd found the net with a near-post flashing header from a corner (17m). Wells had the occasional chance – a Ben Warren speculative drive cannoned back off the post – but mainly it was the visitors who looked more dangerous. Nevertheless, Wells equalised on 33m when Stiles cleverly beat the keeper and sent a looping header into the net.

St. Austell scored twice in the first five minutes after half-time, the first Slateford’s mazy run and speculative shot from 20 yards which the home keeper appeared to have seen too late, and the second Goldsworthy’s smart, opportunistic interception of a headed back-pass. It was then fairly one-way traffic as St Austell looked for a fourth, but Wells made it a nervy finish for the Cornish club by pulling a goal back on 80m, a 15 yarder blasted home by Stiles. Shortly before the end, Wells’ no.12 got a straight red for a challenge; it looked a slightly harsh decision, but the referee was close to the incident and had no hesitation. Not a bad game by any standards; a deserved win for the Cornish side.

FA Vase Second Round Qualifying: Wells City 2 AFC St Austell 3
Admission with programme included: £4 concession
Refreshments: £1.20 for a pasty from the tea-hut at half-time. This was, of course, after they had had to send out for emergency supplies following the feathered fiend’s fuss ……
Attendance: 102

[Ally]

Cornish folks and their pasties.

Great read Ossie.

How interesting re the Merino wool.

I absolutely adore vegetables but somehow marrow (and courgette) leave me cold. If you ever tell me you find marrow in a tin Ossie I will keel over in shock a la tinned haggis.


That sounded like some spider!

Thanks again Ossie.

[Kaz]

Another great read Ossie! I guess roast Ostrich stuffed narrow will be on the menu then!

Had to giggle at pastygate! At least you didn't start a jam-or-cream-first-on-a-scone riot!

[cromwell]

Wells is a beautiful and unusual place, with the water running down the sides of the road, and the Cathedral. I do like the bit about the sliding tackles, legal and illegal. Street - did they make shoes there at one time? Probably not. Great read Os. You seem to get more entertainment out of the lower tier matches than the Premiership.

[cruiser2]

As Cromwell has said, great reading with no waffle as in most sport reports.
Should be published in one of the national dailies

[Kaz]

Crommers, yes Clarks shoes! There is a Clarks shopping village there now

[TheOstrich]

Yes, Mrs O and I have "done" Clarks Shopping Village - it's quite large, actually. We went last Spring, midweek, and it was pretty crowded; had to wait ages to get served coffees in one of the big cafés there. It's not all shoes, there was an M&S and all the usual outlets like Cotton Traders, Gap, Portmerion, Sports Direct, North Face, Cornish Pasty Shop (where the Ostrich was dumped whilst Mrs O carried out some retail therapy ). They also had a good chocolate "section", Cadburys, Lindt, so on, which I was banned from exploring.

We'd certainly go again, but we'd go off season and early in the day.

I don't know if it's still the same now, but I recall from when we used to live down this way, 20 years ago, if you wanted good quality "seconds" for shoes, it was better to wander into Street's town centre itself where there were plenty of independent shops selling footware ...

[TheOstrich]

22/09 – On Friday, the Ostrich was up bright and early, for today was Marrow Day , and the bird had an appointment at the Farmers Market. Which raises the question, why are Farmers Markets staged at unearthly hours, like 08:30 to 11:30? That timing might be alright if you’re a farmer, and you’ve just finished the 06:00 milking, but for the rest of us (retired) mortals, 08:30 is quite honestly a bridge too far …..

So off the bird trundled, down to the Methodist Hall, and inside greeted the Vegetable Lady – only to be met with:
“No marrows today”
“What, you’ve sold out already?”
“No – none on sale today at all!”

The Ostrich trudged dejectedly back home, Asda bag empty, to acquaint Mrs O of the unfortunate proceedings.

“Hur, hur, hur … ” was the unsympathetic response.

Knowing Mrs O’s views on preparing and cooking the pesky vegetable, I am now wondering if the marrows were all sabotaged. I wonder if CCTV would show a balaclava’d Mrs O flitting round the marrow fields with a large carving knife, doing her worst ……

We are already referring to last Friday as “MarrowGate”!

To Saturday, and with the current round of South Western Railway strikes finishing last weekend, time to let the train take the strain before the next tranche are inevitably announced*, the RMT trade union and the rail company still being at complete loggerheads. I had contemplated travelling down to Eastleigh, but then found that they had changed their kick-off time from 3:00 to 12:35 to allow the game to be broadcast live on BT Sport , and with two changes of train and a mile’s walk to the ground from Southampton Parkway station, that would mean a unrealistically early start from home. However, Westfield vs Cheshunt caught the eye as a good alternative ticking all my boxes; a new ground, two new teams, and a first venture into the Bostik (formerly Isthmian) League.

* I typed this about half an hour before checking the SWT website – and I found strikes have just been announced for Friday 5th and Saturday 6th October …..

The BBC weather app showed rain coming in from the west, which I could just about beat down to the station to catch the 11:51 train, and the inclement weather not arriving in Surrey until around the time the game finished. In the event, it was bucketing in Dorset from around 10:00, and continued incessantly throughout the day. However, it was an easy walk, despite the drizzle, from Woking station out to Westfield’s ground, which is in one corner of the spacious and attractive Woking Park, although I had to work a bit to find the entrance to the football club itself; I’m sure there must be a better route than the one I took, which at one point involved descending a long, dark, twisting staircase into the depths of Hades , (or Woking Leisure Centre as the signs proclaimed it ).

Entering the ground through the turnstile, it’s straight up the stairs to the clubhouse bar, (despite the signs pointing in entirely the wrong direction ), which turned out to be small but quite attractive, in a functional, open-plan office sort of way - all suspended ceiling tiles and LED lighting - but with plenty of wall-mounted historical team photographs and a boardroom area enclosed off at one side. Outside, there’s a long balcony running the length of the building with old, cushioned wooden bar/ restaurant seats available to sit on, and excellent views over the pitch, and although there was further covered seating at ground level below it, the balcony seemed to be the choice of most spectators.

The only drawback was that I was sitting just in front of an air-vent unit that noisily switched on and off throughout the match, and it must have been an extractor fan for the kitchen area, because every time it came on, the delicious smell of frying bacon permeated the air, to the extent that Ossie finished up hanging upside down from the rafters, cross-eyed and drooling. And you can guess who was first in the queue at the hatch at half-time ….

The only other pitchside furniture of note is a small 60 seater stand behind the left-hand goal; there are grassy banks on two sides of the ground available for sitting out on a sunny day (not today!), and a view across the abundant trees on the far touchline, where two of near-neighbours Woking FC’s floodlights were just visible through the murk.

It was a decent, hard-fought, and occasionally feisty match between two well-balanced sides, which made Westfield’s second-half collapse all the stranger. Goalless at the interval, after a first half where both sides attacked skilfully but seemed to lack any killer punch, you’d have probably put money on it ending that way - but three goals within 10 minutes of the restart put paid to that notion.

Cheshunt took the lead when Hallett expertly swivelled and shot into the corner of the net, leaving home keeper Ross completely wrong-footed. Akinsanya easily made it 0-2 two minutes later with the home defence in complete disarray, but then Watson pulled one back, dribbling into the area past several defenders and picking his spot. On 59m, however, Akinsanya forced the ball home during a goalmouth melee, and he completed his hat-trick on 64m with an easy goal from close range. Cheshunt’s Aitken received a straight red on 83m for an off-the-ball two-handed shoving incident, but the result was no longer in doubt by then – Westfield had kept plugging away, but that final telling pass into the area often eluded them.

I think for Westfield, it really was just one of those days today. Nevertheless, Cheshunt might well be challenging for promotion by the end of the season if they can keep up the sort of clinical finishing they displayed in the second half.

A friendly club, Westfield, one I will most likely visit again this season. It was also interesting today to meet and chat with members of the self-styled “Mersey Mafia”, an informal group of ground-hoppers who had travelled down from the Wirral ! A slightly delayed return journey, owing to cows on the line just east of Grateley – the driver had pre-warned of the hazard, and in the event, we edged past them at about 5 mph!

Bostik League South Central Division (Step 4): Westfield 1 Cheshunt 4
Admission: £5 concession, programme: £1. Teamsheets were freely handed out in the bar around 2:45, a nice touch.
Refreshments: £3 for two excellent tiger rolls (ham, cheese ‘n onion) and a can of diet coke. And £2 for the bacon butty
Attendance: 68