Vocal Voices

… to paraphrase the Graham Greene novel!

Just a quick introduction to the nether regions of English soccer. Forget yer Premiership, Championship and Leagues 1 and 2, i.e. all yer moneybags teams. This is all about the Non-League soccer pyramid, Steps 1 to 7 and beyond …
The top tier of non-league footie is the Conference, well not quite so, this season it’s been rebranded as the Vanarama National League. (Apparently if you hire a van from the sponsors, I think they donate £100 to your club). No moneybags teams here, apart from Forest Green Rovers, they’re owned by a vegan millionaire and they don’t sell meat pies at halftime.

http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-england-gl ... e-12416671

Step 2 is National Leagues North and South, in which you’ll find languishing former League teams like Stockport County, the reincarnation of Bradford Park Avenue, and up and coming usurpers like FC United of Manchester, which was formed in 2005 by disgruntled Man Utd fans when the American Glazers Brothers took over the main club, and now play in a brand-new £6.5m 4,400 capacity stadium at Broadhurst Park in North Manchester.

Steps 3 and 4 are the old traditional Northern, Southern and Isthmian Premier Leagues, and their divisions. Evo-stik sponsor the former two leagues, Ryman Stationers the latter, and the sponsorship is pretty up front. Locally, Chasetown had a 10 foot long mock-up of a tube of glue perched on top of their club offices , I don’t know if it’s still there, and a couple of seasons back at Daventry Town, I had to sit through a long pre-match tannoy announcement extolling the virtues of Calor Gas and where the nearest stockists were (Northampton from memory).

Steps 5 and below are all the local leagues within the pyramid, like the West Midlands (Regional) League (125 years old, last season), the East Midlands Counties League, the Hellenic League, the North West Counties League, so on …. By the time you’re down to Step 7B, you’re possibly watching your game at a local recreation ground, pitch roped off, ancient clubhouse and grotty changing rooms, in front of one man and a dog – and an Ostrich, of course …..

Anyway, for this 2015/16 season, I’ve got a priority hit list of 25 clubs I’ve not previously seen, in order to complete my various target leagues. They range from Slimbridge to Gedling Miners Welfare to Sandal RUFC – oh yes, there will be a few reports from far-flung fields where the egg-chasers play their game. Two of those target teams were “knocked off” last week, and my season is all planned out on a spreadsheet ….. but the best laid plans of mice and ostriches, as they say ……

.... now read on!

Saturday 15/08 – Midland League Premier (Step 5)
Highgate United 2 Hereford 1
Admission £4, programme £1.50, decent hot dog ‘ onions £2.50, bottle of water £1

Arrived by train at Whitlocks End station, which is in the countryside on the southern outskirts of the Birmingham conurbation, at 13:20, an hour and a half before kick-off, just in case there was a mega-crowd, today. Usually Highgate get around 75, but today’s opponents were the new Hereford, the 2015 reincarnation of the former famous football league club which went messily bust in December last year after a protracted period of chronic overspending, dodgy East End owners with criminal records, and an extremely long list of unpaid debts. Last Saturday, in a league where the attendances are often below 100, the new Hereford played their first home match in front of 4,017 spectators, and last Tuesday evening, took around 1,200 fans to Stourport Swifts. Speculation had been rife that Highgate United might have attracted a crowd of 2,000 today! In the event, the “official” attendance was announced as 546, but I have no idea where that figure came from; I’d put the crowd at around 800-900. A heck of a turnout, nevertheless, especially when you’ve only got one “turnstile” in operation ….

The football ground is in Tythe Barn Lane, only a few minutes’ walk from the station. The old Tythe Barn Farm at the junction of the road is long since closed and boarded up – I remember over 40 years ago pulling up at that junction in my old Mini, whereupon a gaggle of geese shot out of the farm gate and attacked my tyres! Back in 1967, there was a terrible tragedy at the ground during an FA Amateur Cup game between Highgate and Enfield – a lightning strike down onto the field knocked the players to the ground, and the Highgate centre-half, Tony Allden, died in hospital the following day. The match had to be replayed, and Aston Villa offered to host it – 31,600 fans turned out on an evening to watch the match, and I was in that crowd …...

Today, Highgate had got it all very organised, with two BBQs, numerous security guards, a dog van (but no evidence of dogs, maybe they had supplemented the BBQ), an ice-cream van, and overflow parking on the lower pitch. The potholes in the car-park are as bad as ever, though, and I vowed I’d never take our car there again after I grounded the front bumper in one a few seasons back.

Hereford have got a very young squad with a few older hands. Highgate, promoted this season, have two proven goal-scorers in Lei Brown and Shane Benjamin, so there were the makings of an interesting tussle. Both sides made a rather nervy and cautious start, and there was little to get enthused about until Hereford gave away a rather soft and somewhat iffy penalty for a deemed push, the spot-kick being converted emphatically by Lei Brown (26m).

As the game progressed both sides had their chances, but it was noticeable that Hereford lacked a cutting edge up front and Highgate seemed happy just to keep them at bay. We were quietly meandering towards a tame ending when Brown scored a peach of a goal from a direct free kick, drifting the ball over the wall and beyond the reach of the Hereford keeper (84m) before the Bulls pulled one back, also from a direct free kick just outside the area, scored by Purdie.
So that’s two defeats in three matches for Hereford, and Highgate didn’t exactly look as if they are going to set the league on fire (although they’re top of the table tonight). Early days for both teams, yet, though. It was an average game for entertainment, one that probably won’t linger that long in the memory.

A slightly late finish necessitated a quick gallop back to the station to make the 17:00 train, on which, for the second week running, a fare dodger was caught in my carriage. Why do they do it?

Great read Ossie!!! I really enjoyed that.

£1.50 for a programme - rather less than the £8.50 Chelsea/Arsenal programme two weeks ago!

It'll be interesting too to see how the food fares at all the different grounds.

Thanks for the post Os and I look forward to the next one.

Ally wot wouldn't mind coming to a game with you next time she's in Brum.

When I saw "Hereford" I did wonder if it was the old World Famous Hereford United who beat Leeds United in the F.A. Cup at Elland Road in 2007/8.

Good to hear they are reincarnated nonetheless.

Yes, the new club still uses the famous Herefordshire bull emblem, but with the addition of "Hereford FC" and "2015" and the motto "Forever United". Still all-white strip, and the shirt sponsors were Jewsons, which is a pretty big builders merchants in the West Country, so quite a coup for them.

Because the Highgate programme arrived late one of the Hereford supporters started selling their fanzine "Talking Bull" round the crowd (which was a good 85% Hereford fans anyway) and I picked up a copy for £2.50. I don't normally do fanzines (although I'm an inveterate programme collector) but this was a 56 pp glossy and it's an excellent read. It's been a traumatic last year for the Hereford fans, but there's a real positive buzz around the new club, and I wish them well. They may get into the promotion hunt, can't tell at this stage, but there's a lot of strong teams in this league. In fact, my fixtures spreadsheet tells me I'll be checking out one of the tipped promotion candidates this coming Saturday .....

I'll just stick to the local YMCA... two minutes walk.

Sunday fixtures were called off due to waterlogged pitches. It's AUGUST fcol.

The YMCA comes later in my season, WM .....

In the meantime, and before we further check out the talent in the Midlands League Premier, let's pay a visit to New Mill Lane to catch up on the invariably hapless Coton Green FC ......

Tuesday 18/08/15 @ 18:30 - Midland Football League Division 2 (Step 7)
Coton Green 2 Rostance Edwards 2
Admission £2, programme £2, mug of coffee £1.20, 2 x bags of Kettle crisps £1.50
Attendance - 29

New Mill Lane is in Fazeley, more or less opposite Drayton Manor Theme Park. Ferocious rumble strips on the track down to the ground, not to be taken at more than 3 mph if you value your suspension, but plenty of car parking on site behind the near goal, and a chap collecting the admission money and selling programmes at the side of the pitch. That's the first surprise, a programme! It's compulsory down to Step 6 (although more than a few teams try and wriggle out of it with the time-honoured excuse "the printer's / secretary's / chairman's on holiday") but Coton Green have prepared a 12pp glossy effort, covering the first team games last Saturday and tonight. It’s unashamedly a money-raiser, but I don’t begrudge them that, clubs at this level desperately need income. They’re happy to pocket the cash and make a small profit, I’m happy to get unexpected paperwork for my collection, and everyone’s a winner!

The ground itself has an open aspect and boasts a reasonably modern and spacious changing room block cum clubhouse. Floodlights, after a long battle for planning permission, are due to go up by October, after which their Midland Floodlit Youth League team will start playing at home - reading the programme, they've got quite a thriving junior section. The immaculate pitch resembled a carpet and made Highgate United’s effort last Saturday look like rural meadowlands.

I enquired about Coton Green's 1-10 home drubbing by Alvis Sporting Club last Saturday! Coton Green have been the perennial whipping boys of the league over the last couple of seasons, but despite finishing dismally bottom of the table, they've been repreived from relegation by other clubs going bust or simply disbanding - more common than you might think these days. Apparently their first choice keeper was unavailable and the second choice keeper broke a hand after 20 minutes. The right back had to take the gloves, and after that it was pretty much no contest.

Tonight's opposition, Rostance Edwards, take their name from their sponsors, a fairly large firm of chartered accountants in the Cannock area, run by a couple of soccer-mad partners. They started up as an u-17 team in 2009 and have progressed rapidly since, forming a Saturday team a couple of years ago and entering the bottom of the pyramid. They were promoted last year, have a fairly formidable squad, and are based in Bloxwich, Walsall.

Coton Green came out on the attack and took the game to Rostance Edwards, probing their defence, and keeping the away keeper busy with a series of direct free kicks, all of which were on target. They took the lead on 25m when a defender missed an interception and Andrews joyously thumped the ball home. Rostance Edwards then started chasing the game in earnest but despite a few close shaves, and two blinding stops from the Coton Green keeper, the home team went into the interval still in the lead. Half-time saw the spectacle of five Canada geese fly over the pitch in line abreast before peeling off in perfect formation and descending into the wetlands next to the ground.

Rostance Edwards equalised on 56m – it had been coming – when Sam Plimmer evaded a tackle, made space for himself, and cracked the ball home. But on 70m Coton Green regained the lead. Whether it was a mis-hit or not I don’t know, but a right wing corner corkscrewed erratically along the ground into the area ; taken by surprise, everyone missed it, the ball took a deflection, Coton defender Reddish took a wild swing at it, connected, and it cannoned into the net off the underside of the bar.

The lead was short-lived, confusion in the home defence allowed Baxter to equalise which he celebrated in some style, after which both sides pretty much settled for the draw, including the referee who only played a minute’s extra time despite a lengthy stoppage for a blood injury and three substitutions.

As a game finished, a further phalanx of 25 geese in V formation flew directly overhead and receded westwards into the yellow, orange and grey sunset – a marvellous sight.

And a fair result - although Coton Green will no doubt be the happier of the two sides!

Saturday 22/08/15 @ 15:00 - Midland Football League Premier (Step 5)
Coleshill Town 1 Heanor Town 4
Admission £4, Golden Goal ticket £1 (hopeless, I drew the 82nd minute ), programme £1.50, tray of chips, or should we say frits £2.
Attendance - 145

Coleshill Town are currently in exile at The Lamb ground, the home of National League North club Tamworth while a 3G artificial pitch goes in at their own ground, Pack Meadow. I gather they’ve had a little bit of a setback as hardcore to the wrong specification was inadvertently laid and had to be replaced - it’s set their timetable back a couple of weeks so the new pitch won't be ready until October sometime. A lot of soccer fans don't like artificial surfaces, but I've no real problem over them, on the whole they do play "truer" than grass, although a bit slower, and they do tend to suffer less postponements in bad weather. They can cost around £300K to put in, but grants are available if you know where to look, and clubs can generate a reasonably good income from them, hiring them out to schools, so on.

I managed to have a bit of a wander round The Lamb ground today as it was open all areas for this game. It's a good old-fashioned stadium situated fairly close to the town centre, behind the Snowdome (Tamworth's main attraction); been there for years and hasn't changed much, all corrugated iron and brick. The clubhouse is a bit of a dingy dive, however – coming out of the sun, it took me some time to adjust to the ambient gloom inside and I managed to stumble over an internal step, nearly twisting my ankle, before doing so.

Coleshill Town came back down to earth with a bump today after their FA Cup Extra Preliminary Round 11-0 drubbing of West Midlands League minnows Ellesmere Rangers in their last game here. They were founded in 1885 and have been bumbling along quite happily in the lower reaches. They used to be nicknamed "The Rabbits" apparently, down to the renowned pies they used to serve up at matches. A few years back, another go-ahead local club, Dosthill Colts, became their tenants, and then they sort of took over Coleshill in a reverse-takeover ploy - the idea was that after a season of playing as "Coleshill Town" in Dosthill's team colours, they were going to change their name to play as "Dosthill Colts" again, but that never came to pass. Coleshill had a good season last year, and were touted as a team to watch this season.

Heanor Town have been playing since 1878 and can actually name both Nigel Clough (Brian's son) and Nigel Pearson (ex Leicester City manager) as former players. It seems that I had a run in with Pearson earlier this year ...
http://www.skysports.com/football/news/ ... conference
Heanor were playing in the Northern Counties East League last season but actually asked for a sideways move into the Midland League close season, on the grounds that it would mean less travelling, although having to visit two league clubs actually based in the City of Hereford this year, I'm not quite sure how that works out for a Derbyshire club! A bit of an unknown quantity, but unbeaten so far this campaign.

Both sides started with some verve, and both keepers were forced into a series sharp saves in the opening 10 minutes or so, the pick being Heanor keeper Harris’s sprawling deflection of a low goal-bound header. But Harris couldn’t control the ball on 17m and Coleshill’s Hughes managed to knock it in from an acute angle. However, Heanor were level 5 minutes later when Benger got loose through the middle and finished coolly and they went ahead on 35m when Cooper controlled the ball well just inside the box, swivelled, and hit it home.

Just after the interval, Heanor’s most dangerous forward, Debrouwer, flashed a diving header narrowly over the bar from a right wing cross, but after that, with Coleshill now chasing the game, the away side were happy to consolidate. Coleshill had their chances, most noticeably when Smikle put an easy one over the bar, and their heads gradually went down. Two late goals were the icing on the cake. Coleshill’s Barlone was booked for dissent after a fairly innocuous foul given against him; the free-kick was swung over to the back post and Bowler stole in to knock the ball home, then Gilson took advantage of a poor backpass to go one on one with the keeper and roll the ball past him (90m).

So, a worthy win for Heanor. A very entertaining first half, but the second half was much more low-key.
And I was amused to be personally serenaded by the Heanor Town Ultras in the main stand as I made my way towards the exit late on in the game with Coleshill 1-4 down: “We can see you leaving .....…” they sang!

£8.50 including a programme and food is not bad, though I would take a flask and a sarnie.

It is really quite amazing how long ago some of these clubs were founded and are still going. A testament to how popular local football is?

Your reports are much better than some of the drivel in the Sunday papers. Keep it up