Funeral wishes

[Osc]

Have any of you written down what you would like (or not like) for your funeral? I have been meaning to do this for ages, and finally did it today. This being Ireland, a requiem mass with trimmings is presupposed, but neither of us wants church involvement. I've set out which undertaker and crematorium, named two pieces of music I want, and suggested what photo to use when I am laid out in the funeral home. I'll give it to Miss Osc today when we go to her house for dinner. I don't find it maudlin, of course I hope she doesn't need it for many years, but it seems practical to me.

[TheOstrich]

Nothing written down, Osc, but I think Mrs O and I have a general consensus as to what each other wants, which are actually quite different!

In my case, nothing elaborate, no fuss, crematorium jobbie, no memorial, ashes scattered somewhere scenic .... quietly slope off-stage, really.

<Ossie in philosophical mode> Of course, it's not really all about what you want, is it? - it's more of a balancing act with what will bring comfort and closure to those left behind.

[saundra]

Well done osc so many people don't do it and should
When B died after a month or two I paid and arranged my funeral wishes
A cremation a closed coffin before hand just a celebrant to speak that's it plus no huge wreaths couple of bunches of flowers from morrisons but don't think they would do that with the flowers we've no family now only the 2sons and grandchildren ho and it's paid for hope of got a bargain

[Weka]

All I know is mum wants "bay out of hell" played.

[saundra]

No body is planning to die osc

[Ally]

Saundra.

Hopefully it won't be for years and years and a long long time but Don and my lads know what to do with me.

Wicker coffin, cremated and ashes scattered in my beloved Mediterranean sea whilst Golden Earring's Radar Love is being blasted out!

[saundra]

Don't forget a party ally
I forgot to say my bill is still in his wardrobe iv just never done anything about it except some of him is in his beloved wales

[JoM]

I haven't really thought too deeply about this, I sometimes think about music I'd want to be played. One of my favourite songs is Green Day's Waiting but not sure the first line is really life/death suitable "I've been waiting a lifetime for this moment to come..."

The choice around here is cremation or if you want burial then the 'local' cemetery is out of the area as all burial ground around here is full.

Just going slightly off on a tangent. Some ashes were 'scattered' around the base of a tree in the woods at the start of the year. Flowers were left and there were candles and cards left there too. Thing is, the ashes - or at least most of them - are still just lying there. I expect the family thought they'd blow away but they haven't

[meriad]

I think it's an important thing to think about and for the family to know about as it can cause a lot of upset. And

My family know that first and foremost, I'm an organ donor and they can harvest whatever can be used in any way; then cremated (I do not want to be buried) and my ashes scattered under a silver birch tree. One of my favourite trees and hopefully my family will then always remember me with a smile whenever they see one

As for music - not thought about that; in fact I'd rather not have a sad memorial service, instead - small cremation but big party to scatter the ashes; that'd be perfect


But Ossie is quite spot on..

Of course, it's not really all about what you want, is it? - it's more of a balancing act with what will bring comfort and closure to those left behind.

My colleague is determined that she would like her parents buried in a cemetery as she wants to know where they so she can visit them. For me, having lost my dad whilst living in SA and he was buried there; and me now living in the UK it's quite the opposite - I wasn't able to go to his grave as much as I probably would have had I remained in SA so knowing what I know now I'd like the memories to be free if that makes sense? I don't want anyone to feel bound by a single location

[cromwell]

Have any of you written down what you would like (or not like) for your funeral?

Yes, make absolutely sure that I've snuffed it before they screw the coffin lid down!