WM, my father was RAF for 40 years, he joined when he was 15. My mother was RAF for 4 years but had to leave when pregnant with my brother (my how rules change). My maternal Grandfather was Army, his youngest son Army and I was also in exactly the same job as my uncle in the Army. My Paternal Grandfather had a 200 year history in the Navy and was Navy during the war (left a protected job to do so). His second son was Navy too.
When I say that I feel the way you do about this, I really mean it. I was RAF orientated from birth and services till I was 25. Mrs S lost a Grandfather and an Uncle (RAF), to two different wars. She's not just mad about this, she is both personally offended at the insult to her personal family loss and also totally enraged by it.
Personally, for me, on reflection, I would prefer public birching for this kind of offense, broadcast so that everyone can see their shame. It worked perfectly in Manx land and since it has been removed public order issues like this have risen dramatically.
Maybe I'm just a barbarian, but barbarians do have their uses from time to time...