19/01 – today’s sporting venture was yet another game affected by the weather – or rather, the weather forecast ….. I do have my suspicions about the accuracy of the BBC Weather App, which provides short term, medium term, and long range forecasts.
The long range forecast, in my experience, is always depicted by a dark cloud. In other words, no sun, no rain, no weather at all really, just plain dull. All terribly British, and it doesn’t matter if you’re looking as fortnight, a month, or a year ahead – it’s just going to be dull. The medium range forecast is the one where they start guessing at what the weather is going to be, probably using pine cones or seaweed or onion skins or cow’s backsides or similar. * Now that’s all very well, but any resemblance to what the weather’s really going to be like is purely coincidental. The short range weather forecast is much more accurate, and seemingly goes something like this:
“Jim, look outta the window, what’s it doin’?”
“Bloody bucketing it down!”
“Right, we’ll make it Heavy Rain with 100% Chance of Precipitation, then …. ”
The trouble is, halfway through the week, Ossie looks at the medium range forecast and then his footie fixtures, and picks a match. So a couple of days back, with Sunshine and Scattered Showers, and a 30% Chance of Precipitation as the medium range forecast for Saturday – and crucially no rail strikes (the RMT union and South Western Railway are still hurling social media invective at each other , but the former have not yet announced their next round of industrial inaction) – Ossie plumped for a trip to Woking to watch Sheerwater take on top-of-the-table Frimley Green in a Combined Counties League game. And Friday, that was still the plan, although the medium range forecast had morphed into Occasional Light Drizzle and a 54% Chance of Precipitation. And even that slightly less favourable forecast then turned out to be fantasy ……
On Saturday morning, the Ostrich awoke to bucketing rain! And lo and behold, the short range forecast , according to the App, was duly reported as 100% Chance of Precipitation. And given the next two hours’ weather was down as a 99% Chance of Precipitation followed by a 98% Chance of Precipitation, no way was the bird going to walk down to the station without being drowned! So a major rethink of the day’s sporting entertainment was necessary and the bird eventually opted for a shortish car trip to the self-styled Special Effect Stadium to see Frome Town host the Metropolitan Police in a Southern League match.
Now the Metropolitan Police, you may recall, were one of a small bunch of London-based, formerly Isthmian League teams, who were summarily instructed by the FA last summer to ply their trade this season in the Southern League’s South-Western division, and promptly shrieked about it.
“We’ve got to go WHERE? Merthyr Tydfil? We haven’t been there since the Miners’ Strike! Get yer truncheons out, lads …. ”
But all their protesting did them no good, into the South West they were dumped, and actually, they’ve made a very good fist of it! They’re currently second in the league, chasing Taunton Town, and they did indeed look a very good side today. Frome Town in contrast are second from bottom; they’ve only avoided relegation narrowly in the last two seasons. This was my third game at their ground since moving into the area; the first, on Boxing Day 2016 versus Basingstoke, was dreadful and the second, last April against Farnborough, was an extremely temperamental affair, the referee all but losing control of it. Happily, today’s game was much better entertainment.
Frome’s gargantuan clubhouse rises up the slope behind one goal, and the terracing is separated from it by a lengthy white brick wall, around 5 feet in height. Some bright spark however, since I last visited the place, has allowed this to be used as a “graffiti wall” and it’s now decked out in garish ‘tags’, including “The Robins” and “Frome Town FC” and “#BA11” signs (the latter refers, I think, to the local independent radio station) – and it looks awful! But then I’m older generation and no Banksy. Still, there are a number of cartoon robins, including one appearing very much down in the mouth and shrugging its wings, the look most goalkeepers have when the defence have blundered yet again and he’s just conceded the third goal. Actually, for Frome Town, it’s probably pretty apt …..
A fast-paced, end-to-end game in the first half looked like it was going to remain goalless until the Mother of all Goalmouth Scrambles in the Frome area concluded in the 44th minute with Oliver Robinson poking the ball over the line – hard luck on the home side’s debutant keeper who had blocked at least two attempts in the melee.
The Police extended their lead early in the second half when a superb ball in from the left beat the keeper, and flew across the box to the far post, where a defender and an attacker collided trying to get at it. The referee had no hesitation in awarding a penalty (it looked like he signalled hand-ball), and Jack Mazzone converted from the spot. Frome looked increasingly weary, but a triple substitution on 63m gave them fresh impetus, and for a time it looked as if they might get back into the game. However they always looked susceptible to conceding a break-away third goal, and Max Blackmore duly completed the scoring a few minutes before the end.
I'm going to say it before Crommers dpoes - a classic smash 'n grab raid by the Police!
Evostik League South Premier South (Level 3): Frome Town 0 Metropolitan Police 3
Admission: £8.50 (oldie concession). Raffle £1.
Programme: overpriced at £2 (uber-glossy and with very little content)
Refreshments: as I had some time to kill, I stopped off at the Somerset Arms in Maiden Bradley pre-game for a delicious bowl of wild mushroom soup, served with two warmed crusty rolls and lashings of butter for £4.50. <Sigh> To die for ….. Fayre partaken at the ground was a Pukka Pie, (the one in the black foil wrapping which is usually a nod to steak), and a cuppa coffee for £3.60
Attendance: 174
* “Onion skins very thin, mild winter coming in;
Onion skins thick and tough, coming winter cold and rough.”
“A cow with its tail to the West makes the weather best,
A cow with its tail to the East makes the weather least.”