Mad Birds and Cornishmen

[cromwell]

Sounds like a cracking match Os.
I might have had to pass on the sausages though!

[miasmum]

As long as he licked them clean before he picked up the next persons

[cromwell]

Yes, standards must be maintained!

[TheOstrich]

I don't even want to think about it .....

[JoM]

Blimey Ossie, we had the same problem with our oven. John had a look and sussed that it was the element around the fan so I ordered a new one from (I think) the Element Man and John fitted it in 10 minutes - £25 including postage

I think that’d put me off sausages for life

We’re wearing a track between here and Manchester, tonight’s our third home game in a week. All I’ll say is that Newcastle are dirty cheating timewasters and the refereeing in the Premiership is the appalling.

[TheOstrich]

Ronaldo in a sulk again?

[TheOstrich]

Leisurely morning coffee time in the Nest ….

Mrs O, conversationally: “Oh look, the sun’s just come out!”
Ossie: “Oh that’s ni ….. AARGH, THE SUN’S OUT! Charge the mobiles! Update the laptop! Bake the rock cakes! Take that shower!”
“Don’t panic, we’ve got the rest of the day.”
“No, we haven’t. We’ve only got till 4 o’clock! That’s when the BBC say the thunderstorms are coming back in!”

If you think I’m joking …. well, that was this morning!
We managed to get (most of) those busy tasks done while the leccy was still free. Such is life in Ostrichville, 2022!

The previous Friday, we had visited SiL for morning coffee and cake - always a fraught experience as we have to watch our Ps and Q’s and be Very Careful over Family Matters and Under No Circumstances mention Brexit. In fact, Mrs O and I rehearse all the “dangerous scenarios” at some length before we go, so we’ve got our answers straight. You’ve probably got relatives like that as well.

Only one very small cup, and one very small slice were on offer (as usual ) so after making our goodbyes, we traditionally headed off to the nearby Old Parlour Farm Café for lunch (Ossie, the full English for £10.50 and Mrs O the smashed avos on sourdough for £8). But we hit an unexpected problem in getting there - or rather, we managed to miss it! Rounding a bend on the back road from Sparkford, we were suddenly confronted with a large coo in the road, happily munching on the grass verge. We managed to get round her OK, and when we got to the farm café, I reported the coo and the location and asked if they knew the likely farmer responsible.

We’re only occasional visitors there and they probably thought we were “townies” so they trotted out the killer question:
“Was it a Friesian?”

Ha! The bird knows his coos, you cannot bamboozle an Ostrich ! Let me tell you a story. When I first moved from the big city to the countryside back around 1980, I had to visit farms for the first time in my life, doing their accounts, and I was on a huge learning curve. Conversationally, I said to one farmer:
“Those are Herefords, aren’t they?”
“No” he said, laconically.
“Oh,” I said, “I thought they were.”
“Why did you think that?”
“They’re black and white. Hereford United play in black and white ….”
“Herefords are brown and white. Them be Friesians ….”

So yes, I said, it’s a Friesian. Ah, then it’ll probably be Farmer Lewis, one of his dry cows, they were in the field opposite earlier - we’ll message him. So hopefully all got resolved.

And to continue the theme of seeing strange things, whilst we were eating lunch, we saw through the picture windows a low-flying Osprey. Not the bird, one of those tilt-rotor United States Air Force helicopters that are stationed at RAF Mildenhall and do seem to occasionally bumble over our way. Terribly slow, and they make a tremendous racket, but I suppose they do their job.
https://www.express.co.uk/news/uk/16022 ... ridgeshire

So to Saturday, and apologies it’s yet another rugby match. It’s the way the fixtures have fallen this Autumn, but I should be back to soccer next week, all other things being equal.

My second-ever visit to Doric Park, Trowbridge RFC’s spacious campus on the A361 Devizes Road north-east and just outside the town conurbation. My previous game there was back in January 2019, a narrow 15-17 defeat by Old Centralians RFC, the kick-off being heavily delayed as the opposition coach broke down en-route. No such problems this time around, fortunately.

The ground was as I remembered it, four pitches with the second’s pitch being floodlit. The first team pitch in front of the clubhouse is wooden-railed on all four sides with plenty of advertising hoardings, and a manual scoreboard in the corner on the far side. There’s a large flagged patio between the clubhouse and pitch which provides an adequate spectating area, also a children’s playground and a designated smoking hut.
The clubhouse itself is relatively new; it dates from 2014. The bar area inside is very spacious with seating for over 100 guests; when I arrived, there was a club dinner in progress taking up just one half of it, leaving plenty of room for other punters. The usual wall furnishings were on display; club plaques and signed international shirts, and an ancient wooden hospital crutch inscribed, for some reason, “We Beat Avonvale”! The food hatch (“Sideline Servery”) is at one end of this room, serving a basic hot food selection. Parking in front of the clubhouse is more than adequate; there’s a huge gravelled overspill area at the town end of it which features a static “Webuyanycar” office, but no sign of Schofield, thankfully.

Having seen the teams 9th and 10th in this 11-strong league last week, today was bottom vs 5th, with Trowbridge having failed to record any league points at all so far this season. In fairness to them, they appear to be rebuilding their squad and the average age of the team today was just 23. Newent almost took the lead in the 2nd minute after a valiant attempt to dribble the ball over the line, but the ball made it to out-of-bounds first! The host’s scrum-half then gained a huge amount of yardage with a lightning-fast mazy run through Newent’s defence and that set the scene for a fascinating battle. There was an “edge” to the game from the start; Newent’s beefy no.5 was definitely “up for it” and wasted no time in winding the home team up - within the first 10 minutes both Trowbridge’s diminutive scrum half and their no.14 had invited him outside for meaningful discussions!

Newent opened the scoring on 4m with a converted try by Fletcher; Trowbridge quickly responded when Davies went over from a close-range scrum and took an 8-7 lead with an easy straight penalty by Smith (28m). But just before the break, a quick-fire passing movement enabled Newent’s Ivell to find the space to give his side an 8-14 advantage.

The second half saw Trowbridge’s forwards begin to dominate and Newent began to lose ground in the scrum. On 45m a Hales try for Trowbridge was followed by - very unusually - the relatively easy conversion attempt being charged down; I cannot remember when I last saw such a thing happen. Trowbridge retook the lead on 55m when Jenner struggled over; this time the conversion hit the outside of a post. Four minutes later, a Trowbridge player was yellow-carded and the resulting successful penalty made it 18-17. Everything to play for at this point, but gradually Trowbridge upped the pressure and were rewarded with tries from Oakley and Robertson, the latter diving over from a scrum on the line to make it 30-17. Even so, Newent came back with a converted try on 83m and it was still anyone’s game until the home team notched a 30-yard penalty well into stoppage time to clinch the points.

Another very entertaining Saturday game for the neutral Ostrich!

22/10/22 – Regional League 2 Severn (Level 6)
Trowbridge RFC 33 Newent RFC 24
Admission: free
Programme: On-line only. The weekly issue of “Park Life” is accessible from their website and is a “Flipping-Book” production. 56pp of which the vast majority is generic / advertising - only three pages had match-specific content as far as I can see. Home print options are available, but with ink the price it currently is, I’ll pass on that.
Refreshments: I mentioned the “Sideline Servery” above. When I arrived at the hatch, I was their first customer, and the manager had obviously recruited a number of the U18 Colts, by the look of them, to help out on the day. I ordered a sausage bap - the sausages were the only thing on offer at that point.
“Go and wash your hands,” he told one of the hapless volunteers.
“I see your hygiene rating’s better than Frome’s,” I quipped, which got a laugh (deadly rivals).
So we watched the youngster fish out two sausages from the fryer with a pair of tongs, and then attempt to cut one of them in half lengthways with a carving knife in one hand and the tongs in the other! This took some time, but the deed was eventually accomplished. The lad then surreptitiously arranged the four halved sausages on the bun by hand. I let him off!
Pre-game sausage bap and Coke £4, half-time bacon bap £2.50.
Attendance: 183.

[Ally]

I have laughed out loud at sausagegate.

Blimey that smashed avos and sour dough bread was expensive!

Our local cafe does this (bread toasted) for 3.50€

Absolutely brilliant read....the sun's out. Quick!

[cromwell]

We’re wearing a track between here and Manchester, tonight’s our third home game in a week. All I’ll say is that Newcastle are dirty cheating timewasters and the refereeing in the Premiership is the appalling.

Don't sit on the fence Jo, give it to us straight!

[cromwell]

Sounds like a good game again Os.
Sausage baps, it'll be fine dining next!